How to properly answer a call of nature in the great outdoors

Ideally, you should leave as little trace as possible outdoors. That means producing a minimum of waste and rubbish. If you need to go to the bathroom outside, you can only do this to a limited extent. Bushcrafters and survivalists tend to opt for ‘taking and disposing’, where you store your ‘output’ in water-tight, air-tight containers until you reach the next campsite, where you can dispose of it appropriately.

However, many people find thisan unpleasant concept, particularly for multi-day trips. So, here are a few tips for the next time you need to spend a penny outdoors.

Dig a hole: bury your excretions

Burying your waste is better than carelessly leaving it where it falls. Dig a small hole and use it as a toilet to relieve yourself into. Ideally, you can achieve this with a folding spade, available in handy sizes that’ll fit in your backpack. If you’ve not got one with you, a spoon or larger branch will do. Pile up the soil you dug out so you can cover over your outdoor loo after you’ve used it: nobody will see or smell that you were there.

NB: dig the hole so it’s deep enough for everything to disappear, but it doesn’t need to be 30 cm deep. 10–15 cm is plenty for a good loo. Find a spot for your toilet that’s at least 70 metres away from water, hiking routes and campsites. It’s important that faecal matter and germs don’t end up in the groundwater, where they can easily survive for weeks.

When choosing a spot to do your business, watch out for poisonous plants, anthills and beehives. You don’t really want to be rubbing up against a nettle!

Toilet paper, wet wipes and tissues are very hard for nature to break down – some of them take multiple decades to degrade. You should put any used toilet paper in a well-sealed bag and take it with you. The same goes for sanitary products and nappies. A dog waste bag is very good for this. You can also burn toilet paper, as long as there’s no risk of a forest fire.

Leaves and snowballs as loo roll

If you get caught out without any paper, fear not: before toilet paper was invented, people had to use natural solutions to wipe their backside. You can use large, soft leaves as an alternative; maple or beech leaves are particularly effective. If you’re using leaves, stay away from poisonous, stinging or spiky leaves. In unfamiliar areas, you should be extra-careful when choosing what to clean yourself with.

To protect nature, don’t pull up any plants by the roots; leaves that have fallen off will do their job just as well. Tree bark with a smooth surface is also a good choice. Moss is less well-suited: true, it’s soft, but it crumbles up very easily.

You can also use water from your water bottle to clean yourself after doing your business. In winter, ergonomically shaped snowballs can also do sterling work after you’ve used your outdoor loo.

Nothing to wipe yourself with?

In that case, it’s time to get your hands dirty – now, that’s something you’ll have to get your head around! Clean your hands afterwards on the grass and with soil, or use disinfectant, rather than washing your hands in a spring or animal trough. If you’re in a group, make an agreement on where you’re going to go to the loo. Mark holes you’ve previously dug with a stick so you don’t have an unpleasant surprise later.

After darkness has fallen, a headlamp will help you easily find a suitable place to go. And you’ve got your hands free.

In short: you need to take a conscious, cautious approach to local woods and mountains so the great outdoors remains an enjoyable place for everyone to visit. And with these tips in your pocket, your trip in the wilderness can be a adventure as close to nature as it gets – with a dash of bona fide freedom.